Monday, October 27, 2008

Election Day

VS
Well, here they are the 2008 Republican and Democratic nominees for the President of the United States of America. Just about one week from now I will be standing in my little both making my vote and hoping that the rest of our country is doing the same.

Now, I will be the first to admit that I am not the most educated person when it comes to political matters... in fact it is difficult for me to have an intelligent conversation with other people about the political process because I am constantly found with the deer in headlights look. However to my own credit I will say that this year I have watched more debates, read more articles and paid more attention to other peoples rantings and ravings about the race than any other election to date. So you would think that with all of this effort on my part I would be decided and confident in the person I am going to vote for.

WRONG-O.... I am just a little perplexed here. I mean we have the entire United States of America full of people ( roughly 301,139,947), and these are the best two guys we came up with? I mean if we have to pick someone to represent America I just think we could have done a little bit more searching for candidates. Is it right that just because someone has been involved with politics their whole life that they are somehow better equipped for the job? It seems like people who spend their careers as a politician end up becoming a little warped...

That is why I feel that we need to re-think this whole election process.... so I came up with an idea and I wanted to know what you thought about it before I propose it to Washington for review. If you have any further suggestions let me know!

Next election I think we should go AMERICAN IDOL STYLE! Think about the popularity and mania around American Idol... if we could just harness that energy and diligence in searching the Nation for the best of the best, I think we could A. Weed out the weirdos B. Increase the youth vote C. Find the "very best" candidates from each state (Ok.... so I realize that we might attract more weirdos than usual if we create a national television program out of this... but don't worry there will be screening, drug tests, and background checks :)

So under this premise we go state to state holding tryouts (Regular rules apply must be 35 years of age, a native born citizen, and residents in the U.S. for 14 years). And widdle down the contestants to one from each state and send them to Washington! Through a series of one hour TV specials we make cuts and eliminations as voted on by the American Public. Until we come up with a substantial pool... like four people that we can choose from for the final vote. Then there will be a final two hour special to announce the winner!

Just think of the possibilities!!!!! I am thinking of getting Neil Diamond to Sing the Theme Song, something with the same feel as "We're Coming to America."

We will get a panel of judges to critique contestants answers to politically prevalent questions... like the reporters from Meet the Press and Dateline and all of those kinds of shows. Then perhaps for a little comic relief we ask Steven Colbert to be the host....

Ok, I hope you all know I am am kidding. But seriously I think it would reduce all the money spent on campaigning, and stupid commercials that tell you why not to vote for the other guy. Food for thought.... how do you think we could get better candidates to run for president?

Ps... Don't forget to VOTE!!!!!!!

Monday, October 20, 2008

Monday Afternoon Thoughts


"Let us Oft Speak Kind Words of Each Other"

Thank you to Miss Sarah Ware who sent me an e-mail full of stick figure drawings that successfully distracted me from studying and sparked a desire to Post. I especially enjoyed this one because my "Big Mouth" has served as a grate blessing in my life and also one of my greatest weaknesses. It can be hard to bite your tongue sometimes, but it is so critical to watch what you say... once those words leave your mouth... there is no putting them back.


Tuesday, October 7, 2008

For the Record

I was trying to be funny about the Mcguyver thing. I am not attracted to men with blond hair. Just a personal preference I suppose. It especially is silly to me when it is full and flowing (locks). My apologies to Fabio, Siegfried (Roy's buddy)... wait is he the one who died? If he is I'm really sorry!!! Also... Micheal Bolton, John Tesh, Bon Jovi, and 95% of the 80's rockers. Oh and what about the I Can't Believe it's not Butter Guy... or was that Fabio? Anyways I digress.

I like men's hair brown and short... the shorter the better. One of the many reasons Joe is the most handsome man on earth... Love ya buddy :)

Friday, October 3, 2008

Well if that doesn't STINK I don't know what does


Running out the door five minutes behind schedule I stopped and grabbed the hanging pot which once contained a beautiful hanging petunia that brightened our deck for the summer. However now now it appeared to look more like dead straw tangled on top of a pot. Believe me I tried watering it a few times to resurrect it, but with no success... this thing was fully dead... no signs of life.

Anyways, it has been sitting right next to my door as a reminder to bring it down to the dumpster, but for some reason even with it sitting right in my path I have managed to walk by it at least five times and not do anything with it. So of course now that I was already running late I decided to pick it up and take it to it's grave.... I mean how long will it take me to throw the plant in the dumpster... 2 seconds maybe. WELL that is where I was wrong!!! Because normally it would only take you seconds to throw something in the dumpster, that is only if you don't accidentally THROW YOUR KEYS in the dumpster with the plant.

I should have put my keys in the other "non-throwing the plant in the dumpster hand" but no, I assumed I would have enough dexterity to release the plant and hold on to my keys at the same time. This usually works unless there is a hook on your hanging plant that grabs the key loop right off your finger.

I got on my tiptoes and peered over the edge of the dumpster, they were in there alright... right in a pile of what can only be described as crud. I tried to reach, but the depth of this dumpster was too great for my arm length. I imagined myself bending in head first just far enough to grab them, but the thought of loosing my balance and emerging with Garbage head was just a little too much for me to stomach. So like Mcguyver would naturally do...

I created a device with the hook from the plant (which I could still reach) to try and fish the keys out. Only after a few minutes I became extremely frustrated and realized that I was running later and later by the second.

SO I swallowed my pride and jumped (feet first) into the dumpster grabbed my keys, dusted them off, hopped on my bike and rode like the wind to school. And upon arrival made sure to wash my hands. I want to know who decided to make dumpsters so BLASTED deep!!!! I mean do we really need that much trash just sitting around stewing in the basement of our apartment complex. And I also want to know how I never realized how handsome Mcguyver was... I must have been too little to appreciate his beauty when I was a wee lad.... I mean look at his locks (his hair if you are unfamiliar with the term locks).

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Sidetracked!!!!

Why is it that I have such bad spaghetti bowl brain?!?!! It's like I am traveling down one spaghetti noodle of thought, but then another noodle crosses and I start following that one, then another and another and another!!!! Ya you definitely don't want inside my "noodle" once you get in there's no going back. you become trapped inside by pasta labyrinth. Sometimes I think I have A.D.D. but the more people I talk to the more I realize that most people struggle with this problem. Ok, I take that back it seems to be primarily women. I know a lot of men who can stick to the task at hand and be productive.

Sometimes it makes me feel like I am some sort of small brained animal. Like "Oh look, there's something shiny."